The heart knows its own bitterness,
And a stranger does not share its joy. Proverbs 14:10 (NKJV)  

“What does it feel like?” friends have asked me. Mold is hard to explain and difficult to describe, so I will try to paint a picture for you, dear praying sister. Everyone who goes through the valley of mold has a unique experience, but this is how it feels for me…

• Mold feels like a scary mystery.
• Mold feels like a truck ran over me every morning.
• Mold feels like I can only process one thing at a time.
• Mold feels like I get upset for no apparent reason.
• Mold feels like I need new glasses.
• Mold feels like I’ve been working on my next book for years because of brain fog.
• Mold feels like I can’t plan a trip to see family because that takes too much thought.
• Mold feels like writing down every thought or else I will forget it.
• Mold feels like never finishing my to-do list.
• Mold feels like a broken record crying, “Heal me, O Lord.” 

• Mold feels like a bad dream.
• Mold feels like extreme weariness.
• Mold feels like sleepless nights and endless aches.
• Mold feels like getting up every two hours to use the restroom, praying, “At midnight I rise to give You thanks because of Your righteous laws.”
• Mold feels like getting up at 3:30 a.m. for quiet time with Jesus since I can’t sleep.  
•  
• Mold feels like cancer without the fancy label.
• Mold feels like dizziness when I stand suddenly.
• Mold feels like knots in the back of my neck.
• Mold feels like itchy skin and blotchy areas that come and go.
• Mold feels like chapped lips and sores inside my mouth.
• Mold feels like lower back pain that goes all the way down my legs to my feet.
• Mold feels like numb fingers and toes.
• Mold feels like I often loose my grip.
• Mold feels like being anointed with oil and having great hope, only to feel awful the next day.  
•  
• Mold feels like an elephant sitting on my lungs.
• Mold feels like a sneeze and a sniffle.
• Mold feels like not wanting to even move.
• Mold feels like making myself walk in all-weather because movement is key to moving out the mold.
• Mold feels like dizziness as soon as I come inside from my walks.
• Mold feels like Peter’s wife Eden on the Chosen, wondering when will my healing come?  
•  
• Mold feels like a pain.
• Mold feels like an ice pick up my tail bone.
• Mold feels like the worst cramps ever.
• Mold feels like a rock in my stomach.
• Mold feels like a twisting tummy ache.
• Mold feels like a stab in my liver.
• Mold feels like my husband on his knees by our bed every night, crying out to God.  
•  
• Mold feels like a wilted flower.
• Mold feels like my body reacts to everything.
• Mold feels like giving up all my favorite foods, yet still I feel sick.
• Mold feels like getting confused over all the different lists of foods to avoid or to eat.
• Mold feels like watching others eat the yummy birthday cake I just baked for them.
• Mold feels like nausea so I eat something, then nausea because I ate something.
• Mold feels like reaching out to touch Jesus’ robe, and yet I can’t quite reach.  
•  
• Mold feels like having the answer, but 100 more questions.
• Mold feels like drinking gallons of water a day to flush out the toxins.
• Mold feels like going to the restroom every hour because the mycotoxins destroyed my bladder lining.
• Mold feels like taking tons of magnesium to make sure food actually moves through me.
• Mold feels like I’m pregnant every evening with a swollen gut.
• Mold feels like being curled up with a heating pad and Jesus every morning.  
•  
• Mold feels like loneliness.
• Mold feels like missing the party because I don’t feel well.
• Mold feels like saying good-bye to all my hobbies. 
• Mold feels like throwing away my home in hopes I will get well.
• Mold feels like renter’s insurance is useless as it doesn’t cover mold.
• Mold feels like I’m still sick even after throwing away my home.
• Mold feels like hopelessness, though I keep hoping.  
•  
• Mold feels like no one understands.
• Mold feels like looking into the bewildered eyes of my husband who has prayed every prayer.
• Mold feels like a pat on the shoulder from our youngest son who has only known his mom in pain.
• Mold feels like watching our youngest son get nose bleed after nose bleed.
• Mold feels like wondering why our youngest son can’t eat like his grown-up siblings.
• Mold feels like crying again when his test results are worse than mine.
• Mold feels like thanking God for friends who care.

• Mold feels like an unanswered prayer.
• Mold feels like I’m slowly dying, though I still smile.
• Mold feels like tears in the bathroom where no one sees.
• Mold feels like spending all my livelihood on supplements yet being healed by none.
• Mold feels like giving up but pressing on.
• Mold feels like sharing in the sufferings of Christ.  
•  
• Mold feels like because He lives, I can face tomorrow.
• Mold feels like saying, “Get thee hence, satan… I shall not die but live and declare the works of the Lord!”
• Mold feels like hoping, enduring, persevering, and praying, because tomorrow may be the day Jesus heals my family and me.  

Today’s TEA CUPP:  Dear one, if you found this website because you have mold in your home, I’m so sorry.  I know how miserable you must be.  I’m reading the book of Job in my Bible right now. God’s Word expresses exactly how I’m feeling.  I encourage you to stay in God’s Word, read Job, read the Psalms, read the promises of Jesus in the Gospels; and soon, very soon, by the grace of God and the blood of Jesus, we shall all be made well!  

Though He slay me, yet will I trust Him.
Even so, I will defend my own ways before Him. Job 13:15

Rejoicing in hope, patient in tribulation, continuing steadfastly in prayer.  Romans 12:12 (NKJV)

One thing that might tickle you tea-lovers… the doctor said to drink several cups of green tea and dandelion tea a day to help with detox!  How’s that for God’s grace and sense of humor in our trials?!  

Oh, that my grief were fully weighed,
And my calamity laid with it on the scales!
…For the arrows of the Almighty are within me… Job 6:2-4 (NKJV)    

After several years of visiting doctors, Jennifer Grace was finally diagnosed with Ochratoxin A in September 2022. In October 2022, her home was tested and found to have Aspergillus and Penicillin molds.  An “expert” came to test the house again in November 2022, opening the attic and cellar accesses, releasing additional mold spores which drove her family from their rental home.  In December 2022, they tossed over 7000 pounds of belongings, put keepsakes in storage, and moved temporarily to a guest house. Their family continues to pray for healing and a home with a barn for 3 cats, 3 goats, and 26 chickens. Thank you for praying!!!    

Look on my affliction and my pain, And forgive all my sins. Psalm 25:18 (NKJV)  

Why is my pain perpetual and my wound incurable, Which refuses to be healed?… Jeremiah 15:18 (NKJV)  

...I have heard your prayer, I have seen your tears; surely I will heal you…. 2 Kings 20:5 (NKJV)

And God will wipe away every tear from their eyes; there shall be no more death, nor sorrow, nor crying. There shall be no more pain, for the former things have passed away. Revelation 21:4 (NKJV)

If today’s post was of interest, you might also like to read Heal Me, O Lord and Mold Overturned my Table and My Tears in God’s Bottle.   I also recommend this doctor’s website and book: Dr. Crista. And you will love listening to the healing verses from God’s Word read by Dodie Osteen…  

Scripture from the New King James Version®. Copyright © 1982 by Thomas Nelson.